Ben Burggraaf

About Ben

  • Hey, Ben here. Born and raised in The Mount – I enjoy living a balanced, simple life here with my partner.

    I’ve had my own seasons of figuring things out in life – anxiety, depression, struggles with self-acceptance and self-worth, that damn pesky overthinking thing, health struggles. That's probably part of why I ended up here. Before being a counsellor, I worked in regional roles for companies like Microsoft, Media Works, and Drake Recruitment.

    For me, life is now about living. The perfect day looks like lots of sunshine and surfing, listening to music that makes my soul sing and my body want to move, cruising and enjoying the present moment, moving where the mood takes you without having to rush (why rush if you're not from Russia?!), sticking my nose in a good book and getting lost in a story, watching something that cracks me up or gets you thinking and feeling something new, far too many cups of tea, yummy food, trying and probably failing to do something creative, kicking back and laughing over a good conversation with loved ones, and being in nature/catching a sunset or stargazing and marvelling at it all – which somehow never ceases to get old – and thinking, thank you, and sometimes no thinking at all, just being.

  • Be kind. For everyone is fighting an invisible battle you know nothing about. – Unknown

    Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light. – Dumbledore

    The stars are like letters that inscribe themselves at every moment in the sky. Everything in the world is full of signs. All events are coordinated. All things depend on each other. Everything breathes together. – Plotinus

    Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing there is a field. I'll meet you there. – Rumi

    You do not have to be good. You do not have to walk on your knees for a hundred miles through the desert, repenting. You only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves. – Mary Oliver

    Even after all this time the sun never says to the earth you owe me. Look what happens with a love like that – it lights the whole sky. – Hafiz

    The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and science. He to whom the emotion is a stranger, who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe, is as good as dead – his eyes are closed. – Einstein(would it really be a list of quotes without him?)

    To this day God is the name by which I designate all things which cross my wilful path violently and recklessly, all things which upset my subjective views, plans and intentions and change the course of my life for better or worse. – Jung’s last written words on fate and the unknown, found in his journal after his death

    I know that I know nothing. – Socrates

    "When I was your age I too was very smart. I'm much dumber now." He winked. –The Spiritual Journey of Joseph L. Greenstein, p. 12

    I said to my partner, "I have irrefutable proof God is totally not serious. Look at the evidence – He created you." To which she replied, "No! It's a sign He's a genius." – My partner’s quick-wit, one of the many things I love about her!

    Want to know the cosmic joke? There is no cosmic joke – that’s the cosmic joke. You're welcome. I am also you. Goodbye. And he wandered off into the distance, laughing and dancing. – Unknown

Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life? – Mary Oliver

My Approach

I believe you already have most of the answers inside you. Sometimes you just need a space that's safe enough to hear them. And yes, sometimes I’ll chip in with some ideas of my own – you’re not alone.

In our sessions we strip it back to the basics – just two humans talking honestly, seeing what naturally arises, unhurried and connected. No need for either of us to be someone we’re not, just genuine presence and the openness to see where that takes us.

I work with people stuck in patterns of overthinking, people pleasing, and ADHD – people who look fine on the outside but who feel quietly exhausted and disconnected on the inside. Sensitive, creative, conscious sorts wanting to live with more authenticity, confidence, and ease.

I take an evidence-based, holistic approach – mind, body, emotions, relationships, lived experience. Everything is interconnected. What matters most is that you feel genuinely seen, heard, and free to be yourself.

This is the work I love most – watching someone come back home to themselves, feeling lighter and breathing a little easier, and living more true to who they actually are.

  • My method integrates evidence-based therapy with a whole-person perspective, which creates the conditions for a transformative experience. Counselling is tailored to each individual’s unique needs and goals:

    • Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)

    • Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT)

    • Mindfulness

    • Narrative Therapy

    • Somatic-based body regulation – helping you get out of your mind and back into your body and your senses to regulate your emotions

    • Also influenced by buddhist, non-dual awareness, and jungian psychology ideas

Qualifications, Associations, Memberships, etc.

  • Master’s in Counselling (University of Waikato)

  • Member Australian and New Zealand Mental Health Association (ANZMH)

  • Psychology Today Verified Counsellor

  • Member New Zealand Association of Positive Psychology (NZAPP)

  • Counsellor for I Am Hope (Gumboot Friday)

  • Provisional Member Registered with NZAC

  • Bachelor of Management Studies (Marketing Major BMS, Chairman’s Award Top Marketing Student)

Book now

Ready to start?

You don't have to wait until you're falling apart to deserve support. If something here resonates, reach out.

Send me a brief email about what's going on for you right now – even just a few lines. We'll figure out the rest together.

ben@chatwithben.co.nz

“Reaching out was the hardest part. Everything after that was easier than expected.”
– CHRIS, 38